


The Barrel Drop

by LadyLindariel (Morwen80)



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-08
Updated: 2016-03-08
Packaged: 2018-05-25 11:15:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6192871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morwen80/pseuds/LadyLindariel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Galion is bored on his day off and decided to sneak into Thranduil's secret stash of Dorwinion wine and falls down the barrel drop. The result is a very drunk and wet elf and a very frustrated king.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Barrel Drop

It was just another boring, ordinary day in the kingdom of Mirkwood. Galion had finished all of his duties that were required of him and now he was bored. Thranduil had given Galion the rest of the day off as he himself was spending the day with his wife Gilornien as it had been a long time since it was just the two of them.

Galion slowly made his way down to the wine cellar to see if his good friend Feren was there. Normally he could be found down there and the two of them would sneak drinks of Thranduil's less popular wine as he was less prone to find out. When Galion entered the cellar he noticed it was empty. "Feren must be busy elsewhere." He thought as he lit one of the torches and made his way to the wine rack.

Looking at the many rows of wine displayed neatly on the racks he contemplated on whether or not he should sneak any of Thranduil's wine. After all he was alone and if he were to get caught it wouldn't end well for him, besides he always did this with Feren and it just wouldn't be the same without him. After carefully thinking about it he decided to go ahead and do it. "I mean I would only be tasting a little bit and king Thranduil has so much he is bound not to notice."

After he checked to make sure he was truly alone at the moment and when he realized that he was, he ran his slender fingers along each ornately designed bottle. After a few rows he finally came across the selection where Thranduil kept his special Dorwinion wine. Thranduil saved this type of wine for special occasions and only the king and his family was allowed to drink this wine. This type was his strongest and had a fruity taste to it and it was very hard to come by. Picking up the bottle Galion got a mischievous grin on his face. He was alone and the king wouldn't notice if just a few sips was missing. Would he?

"No, it's too risky." Galion said putting it back. As he began to walk away the urge to rebel and drink it was becoming even more strong. "No! Sneaking that wine is not worth getting tossed in the dungeons. The last ellon who snuck his favorite wine was in the dungeons for three months!" Galion shuddered at the thought of being thrown in there. He wouldn't last a day in those filthy cells. However, the more he fought the urge to sneak the wine, the stronger the desire to rebel and do it became.

Eventually, he couldn't hold back anymore and throwing caution to the wind, Galion ran back to where he put the wine back and grabbed the bottle. He ran his fingers down the smooth glass and then slowly began to take out the stopper. Galion smelled the wine and exhaled slowly relishing the sweet smell the Dorwinion gave off. He then retrieved a wine glass and poured a small amount of the dark red wine and slowly sipped the sweet liquid. "This is truly exquisite. I can see why Thranduil does not want to share this with anyone. However, it just is not safe for the king to keep this to himself. After all, how easy it would be for someone to sneak down here and taint it. Maybe I should test it a little more, just to be safe."

Galion poured another small glass and downed it, and then he proceeded to pour another glass when he had finished that. Before he knew it, he had completely drained the entire bottle of wine and to make matters worse, he was drunk!

Horrified at seeing the empty bottle and realizing he was drunk he sluggishly got to his feet. He knew he had to put the bottle back and get out of the cellar before anyone else came down and noticed what he had done. Galion was by now so drunk he couldn't even see straight let alone walk, but he knew he needed to get rid of the evidence. As Galion made his way back across the room he stumbled and tripped over his feet and collapsed passing out cold before he hit the floor. Unfortunately for poor Galion, he failed to realize that he had passed out cold over the hatch that they used to send the empty wine barrels back to Lake-town, and as an unconscious Galion layed there the board slowly started tipping downwards.

Minutes later Galion slowly came to and as he looked around he couldn't help but feel as if he was slipping downwards. As he sat up trying to clear his head, his eyes nearly popped out of his head when he discovered that he was sliding down toward the opening of the barrel drop! Franticly Galion tried to stand up but drunk as he was he was unable to stay upright and he toppled backwards towards the opening and ungracefully rolled down the board and with a splash, landed in the freezing cold river!

As Galion hit the river he recognized the severity of the situation. "Why didn't I ever take swimming lessons when I was an elfling! HEELLLP!" Galion screamed, flailing his arms wildly in the river trying to stay afloat. Just as he thought he was going to drown, Galion spotted a barrel floating pass him and grabbed it holding onto it for dear life. Galion swore to himself as he passed through the open water gate, "This is the last time I ever get drunk on my own! If I live through this, I swear I am not going to drink again!"

Meanwhile further down river several guards were standing at their post talking when they heard what sounded like screams for help. "Do you hear that Togron? That almost sounds like Galion." Eristion asked with a puzzled look on his face.

"Don't be absurd Eristion. How can that be Galion? He's inside the palace." Replied Togron rolling his eyes.

Just then, the screams became louder and closer and as the guards turned their heads towards the sound Galion was floating by franticly holding on barely keeping his head above the rushing water. For a moment the elves couldn't believe what they were all seeing, and they were beginning to wonder if they were hallucinating when Galion screamed again. "Help me someone, help!"

Togron snapped out of his daze. "Sweet Eru that is Galion, but how in Arda did he get in their!?" Before anyone could answer he took out his horn and sounded the alarm.

Tinunaer, one of Feren and Galion's friends was running alongside him and proceeded to shout at Galion. "Hold on mellon-nín! Don't let go!"

Galion coughed up water and would have said something but his head went under again. Eristion began to run full speed ahead and upon entering the backway to the palace, ran into Feren. "Eristion, what is wrong? Why are you out of breath?"

Eristion could barely get a sentence out. "Galion. Barrels. River. Quick!"

Feren paled and dropped his papers and rushed into Thranduil's private quarters where Thranduil was having lunch with the queen. Before Thranduil could demand an answer Feren spluttered. "Galion is floating down the river sire!"

Thranduil tensed at hearing this. Leave it to his butler to get himself into trouble on one of his few days off. Oh would he make Galion pay for this later. "Very well Feren, make ready my elk."

"Yes my lord Thranduil." Feren bowed and ran to prepare the king's elk.

Thranduil frowned and headed towards the door. "I am sorry Gilornien. I promise I will make this up to you."

Gilornien just laughed. "Worry not love. I just hope Galion is okay. How in the world did he manage to fall in the river?"

Thranduil rolled his eyes. "I do not know, but I will find out one way or another and I promise it will be the one and only time he falls in, unless it is me who throws him in." With that he sped down the halls and towards the stables.

Minutes later Thranduil arrives at the edge of the river and notices the guards hurriedly rushing towards Lake-town while screaming at a panicking Galion to hold on. One of the elves had managed to try and toss him a rope but Galion almost lost his grip on the barrel and went under. Sighing Thranduil, caught up and managed to persuade his elk to enter the rushing river. When Thranduil reached Galion he leaned over and grabbed him by his tunic and they made their way to the shore. Once they got to shore, Thranduil dropped Galion who was coughing up water and looked like a drowned rat.

Thranduil would have laughed at the sight of a sopping wet Galion under normal circumstances, however upon further examination he realized that he was drunk, "Galion! Have you been in my special stash of Dorwinion?!"

Galion tried to stand but from all the drinking and excitement he stumbled and fell right on his bum. He looked up at Thranduil and attempted to answer but could only manage to shake his head.

Thranduil glared at Galion and as everyone waited with baited breath at what the king would do the king just started laughing. "Galion! If you wanted to get drunk, why didn't you just say so?! You are more than welcome to get drunk mellon-nín, but next time invite me to join in the fun!"

Galion just stared at Thranduil wide eyed before bursting out in laughter. "Yes, my lord Thranduil. I give you my solemn word to invite you the next time I do such a thing, however, might I suggest that we get intoxicated somewhere where it will be relatively safe from falling into rivers?"

At that everyone including the king burst out laughing.


End file.
